Lads and lasses, sip on your ale.
Sit down your asses, let me weave you a tale
about an adventurer, true on his quest.
With a fist on his beard, his name was Beard Fist.
He traveled the land, both far and wide-
facing each danger with his friends by his side.
And where other men would crumble and fall,
Beard Fist was there, saving us all.